Sunday, May 9th is Mother’s Day – and it is also the 20th anniversary of my mother’s death. I just wanted to acknowledge all the other motherless daughters out there. You are like me. You did not have the benefit of a mother’s wisdom during your formative years. For me, my mother become ill when I was in the first grade, and her illness consumed my childhood. I raised myself. I dealt with things children should not have to deal with. I cared for my parents when they should have been caring for me. Today’s post is not a recitation of past issues, but a heartfelt, long distance hug to all the motherless daughters out there.
When I met my friend Eleanor, she gave me the book “Motherless Daughters.” Her mother had died from breast cancer when she was in high school and we shared the common bond of the motherless daughter. Feeling lost and rudderless as we fumbled our way into adulthood, marriage, and for her, children. It is a peculiar place to be in and Mother’s Day always feels slightly off kilter to me. Probably because of the double whammy, having it be all about mothers and having my own mother die a few days before that day (back in 1990 the 9th fell on a weekday I believe…at least that is what I remember).
Today there will be lots of talk about motherhood, gifts given, and breakfast in bed made by tiny hands. And that’s beautiful and wonderful and deserved for all those special women out there who have children. May God bless you on Mother’s Day.
But for me and millions of other people who did not have the active participation of mothers while growing up…for those of us who lost our moms when we ourselves were children….I am praying for to today. Let us pray for one another on Mother’s Day.
So today’s post is dedicated to all the motherless daughters….
Thank you for this post – I stopped by a bit late. I lost my mother much later than you – in my 20’s. Mother’s day is difficult. And I did find wisdom in Motherless Daughters – definitely recommend that one a lot when I find someone in “the club” who may need it.